High riskRomance & Dating Scams

Military Romance Scam

In this scam, a fraudster poses as a deployed soldier on a dating app or social media, builds a romance, then asks for money for leave requests, travel, phones, or emergencies that never resolve.

Quick verdict

Risk level
High risk
Scam type
Romance impersonation (military persona)
Main red flag
A 'deployed soldier' partner who cannot meet and asks for money for leave or travel.
What to do first
Do not send money; genuine military personnel do not need you to pay for leave or transfers.

What this scam usually looks like

In this scam, a fraudster poses as a deployed soldier on a dating app or social media, builds a romance, then asks for money for leave requests, travel, phones, or emergencies that never resolve.

Example message pattern

Example pattern — not a real report
Example pattern: 'I'm deployed overseas and can't access my funds. Please send money so I can request leave to come and meet you.'

This is a fictional, anonymised example used to illustrate the pattern. It is not a verified real message, and any names are used only to show how the scam typically reads.

Red flags to watch for

  • A deployed-soldier persona who cannot meet or video call
  • Requests for money for leave, travel, or equipment
  • Claims of being unable to access their own funds
  • Fast, intense affection and talk of a future together
  • Reluctance to provide verifiable identity

What to do

  • Do not send money to an online partner you have not met
  • Be aware militaries do not charge for leave or transfers
  • Search their photos and details for signs of a stolen identity
  • Report the profile and block the account

If you already clicked or replied

  • Stop sending money, especially for 'one last' request
  • If you paid, contact your bank or payment provider
  • Keep messages as evidence and report it
  • Seek support; these scams are emotionally manipulative

What not to do

  • Do not pay for a partner's leave, travel, or emergencies
  • Do not send gift cards or crypto
  • Do not keep paying as requests escalate

Similar scams

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Romance Scam DM

This scam builds an online romantic relationship through messages, then invents an emergency or investment to ask for money, while always avoiding meeting in person.
High risk Romance

Travel Money Romance Scam

In this scam, an online partner promises to finally visit you, then asks for money for flights, a stranded emergency, or a customs or travel fee, but the trip never happens and requests continue.
High risk Romance

Widow Romance Scam

In this scam, a fraudster adopts a grieving widow or widower persona to win sympathy and trust, then asks for money for hardship, debts, or to access a late spouse's funds.

Frequently asked questions

Do soldiers need money to take leave?
No. Militaries do not charge personnel or their partners for leave, transfers, or communications. Any such request is a scam.
The photos look like a real soldier. Are they?
Scammers steal photos of real service members. Search the images and be wary of anyone who cannot meet or verify their identity.
I sent money. What now?
Stop sending more, contact your bank or payment provider, keep evidence, report the profile, and seek support.
How can I verify an online partner?
Insist on a live video call, search their photos, and be cautious of anyone who avoids verification yet asks for money.

Last reviewed: June 2026

Disclaimer: This page provides educational information only to help you recognise common scam patterns. It is not legal, financial, cybersecurity, or law enforcement advice, and it does not confirm whether any specific message, company, or person is genuine or fraudulent. When in doubt, contact the official organisation directly and report concerns to your local authorities.